I have friend named Carol. She's had a passion for genealogy for decades. Now that she's a bit older and her health is failing, some of her family has discouraged her from writing her family history. 

Yet every time I see her she says, "You've really inspired me to write my family history. I need to get it done before I run out of time." Then she tells me how inspired she is to make it happen despite the negative feedback from various family members. 

Sometimes we shed tears because her health often keeps her from completing basic tasks she used to do with ease. I always ask her if I can help. She always declines. In fact, she's very adamant about me not helping. And all the hugs I've given her in the past year have not persuaded her to let me help. 

So I pray for her often. 

On Saturday, I took my kids to a Halloween party. We filled our buckets with candy during the trunk or treat. We enjoyed the costume contest and the dreary gray October sky that turned to a sliver of a crescent moon breaking through the clouds. 

On the way home we stopped at the mailbox. We were expecting mail for the kids. Instead we found a large, brown envelope addressed to me. I took it into the house and tore it open. There was no note, nothing to explain how or why I was receiving an unexpected package. 

I reached into the envelope and pulled out a plain, plastic, spiral notebook. It was a copy of Carol's genealogy and family history. The account includes pedigree charts, maps, and written accounts of various family members. My son asked me, "What did you get, Dad?"

I didn't know how to respond, so I said, "The dreams of a friend. I know exactly what it is."

I didn't know what to say and the words came out clunky and weird. I felt terribly awkward trying to explain to him why someone he didn't know sent me their family stories. Maybe one day I'll do a better job sharing with him the significance of the package. 

But I believe genealogists know. People who've been on the hunt for family know. I only pray the family members who discouraged Carol from completing her work will find value in the small little book one day. 

As an archivist and fan of genealogy, I've often met other folks like Carol. People who yearn to share some small reminiscences of their family with the next generation. 

As a friend, I am honored and touched that Carol would take a moment and share her accomplishments with me. It literally is a feat she dreamed of for a long time, and I'm grateful to know that day is here. 

As President of the Mississippi Genealogy Society, I can say this--if you have desires to compile and write a family history, please do it. One step at a time. We will do our best her to support, help, educate, or whatever else we can do to make your journey a special one. 

In the meantime, keep searching, working, and dreaming. 

Let me get right into it, folks. Genealogy is a field humans have always had an interest in. But what about elves? Do they have an interest in their kin? Do immortals need to know who their birth parents, grandparents, and so forth were?

Where does their genealogy stand in comparison to the dwarves or hobbits? It gets even more interesting when you add orcs into the equation. 

Yes, you read that right. Do elves have an interest in their ancestors? If you really want to know, then click here [1].

To be frank, imaginary creatures might not have an interest in elven genealogy (or their own for that matter). But humans do. Have an interest in elvish genealogy. Hence the website. A quick web search will also lead you to family trees for the various families in the Potterverse, Harry Potter's world [2]. 

Is it such a strange things to see fans of those books and movies do the research and compile family trees? Author Bennett Coles has produced an article providing insights into the Star Wars Universe. That's available here [3].

Again I ask, is this a strange occurrence? No. Not really. From the earliest times we've seen the myths of various locales and regions creating intricate family trees, and from those trees we extract the important stories of the people. At the same time, world religions from across the globe also delve into the study of kinship. The Gospel of St. Matthew, the first book of the New Testament, opens its first chapter with the lineage of Jesus Christ. 

On Family Search and various other genealogical platforms we can trace the ancestors of the U.S. Presidents and other important political families of world nations. They even have functions where you can learn which famous people are your relations. 

But what does it all matter? Why bring it all up today in a short blog post? 

Think about it. All of humankind's most important stories (including fiction and myth and religious systems) are impacted by the study of kin and generations. All of them. In a world that's increasingly tense and where dangers abound, we can find stories of family, whether they're our own or others, that can teach us how closely we're all connected. 

In other words, genealogy can help us learn to love, to forgive, to have compassion on others. It can heal us of past trauma, and it can spark within us a desire to help one another. 

I don't have time to make all the arguments about how important genealogy is today, but hopefully, a few short words showing how collective stories about family are of great import to our society will bring you a smile. And just maybe it will inspire you to look into your own families. 

If not--maybe you need to understand the history of Middle-Earth a little bit better. I mean, did Bilbo sign any deeds or land records pertaining to Bag End? If so, I'm disappointed that his will didn't contain a clause barring Frodo from selling the place to Lobelia Sackville-Baggins. I mean, some cousin-in-laws just don't deserve the good stuff. Let's be real. Is a cousin-in-law even technically family?

Then again, Frodo was invited to the Grey Havens with Elrond and Galadriel, two elves who had very distinguished genealogies. 

1. Johansson, Emil. “The Lord of the Rings Family Tree Project,” n.d. http://lotrproject.com/.

2. Wiki, Contributors to Harry Potter. “Potter Family.” Harry Potter Wiki, n.d. https://harrypotter.fandom.com/wiki/Potter_family.

3. Coles, Bennett, and Bennett Coles. “How to Decipher the Star Wars Family Tree - Bennett R. Coles.” Bennett R. Coles - (blog), May 1, 2024. https://bennettrcoles.com/star-wars-family-tree/#:~:text=Leia%20Organa%20%E2%80%93%20By%20birth%20Leia,with%20the%20help%20of%20Rey.

Hi friends, 

Please forgive me for not posting a blog last week.

If I'm frank, I can say that I didn't even miss it. But that's because the in-laws were in town. They visited our little family last week to celebrate my son and daughter's birthdays (those birthdays are 10 days apart). 

During their visit, we took the grandparents over to the Vicksburg National Military Park. It's a rather stunning historical site meant to preserve our national memory of the Civil War. While there we snapped photos in front of cannons, war memorials, and the carcass of the U. S. S. Cairo, an old ironclad that was sunk without one life lost [1]. Sometime in the 60s, they pulled the remains out of the Yazoo River and created the Gunboat and Museum at the battlefield. It's really impressive. 

Anyway, all that's to say we made memories as a family. I believe that creating new family history is just as important as studying the old. Maybe one day our descendants will argue over who is who in all those photos we took. Maybe not. 

I told the kids about my 3x great-uncle Solomon Robinson who was discharged from his civil war service at Vicksburg. In that way I did do some genealogy last Tuesday. 

Then I berated myself for not studying him enough before we left. I couldn't remember if he was part of the campaign or not, and had to hastily retrieve his pension information from the cloud. Turns out he was discharged there. I had been thinking he had been part of the siege, but his service didn't begin until after the battle. However, he was discharge in Vicksburg as I said earlier [2].  

The kids patiently waited for me to tell them what I knew about Uncle Sol and were amazed to have a family connection with something so significant. But no matter how amazed they were, those little factoids weren't as a cool or interesting as the cannons. 

As so we return to my confession. 

I didn't miss writing the blog last week. I mean, how could I? 

Writing a blog just wasn't going to be as cool as the cannons. 

But hopefully this little travelogue will make up for it. 

1. "USS Cairo Gunboat and Museum," National Parks Service, October 14, 2025, https://www.nps.gov/vick/u-s-s-cairo-gunboat.htm. 

2. Solomon C. Robinson (Pvt., Co. L, 10th Ind. Cav., Civil War), pension no. SC 491040, Case Files of Approved Pension Applications  . . . , 1861-1934; Civil War and Later Pension Files; Record Group 15: Records of the Department of Veteran Affairs; National Archives, Washington D.C.

Let’s face it. Genealogical Societies are rapidly changing. With the advent of technology such as Zoom and A. I., more and more people are attending society meetings from the comfort of their own home. Less and less people are attending in person.

Of course they are. And there’s one reason why. It’s more convenient.

If there’s anything I’ve learned as a librarian and archivist it’s this: people will always choose convenience over optimal until there’s a need for them to choose optimal. I see it in how people access library and archival materials. I see it when people sit down to view their media at home when they choose streaming over a number of better audiovisual experiences. I see it all over the place.

Can I get this at home? Can I get it online? And, everything is online these days, why haven’t you provided a way for me to get access to it in my pajamas?

In a very broad and general sense, the questions embody how genealogical researchers engage with access to records via technology. There’s nothing inherently wrong with those practices either (although it’s a blatantly false assumption that everything is online). At work my colleagues and I have seen a drop in pedagogical content when classes are presented online. It’s difficult for instructors to assess and evaluate student learning outcomes when it’s more difficult to engage the class in person. And for many settings, engagement is the name of the game.  

Still, students want to take the course online. I get it. I really do. I love to engage in more convenient ways too. So am I saying that Genealogical Society meetings are worse via Zoom? Well, that’s debatable, and the answer depends on the content of the meeting. Unfortunately though, that’s not really the idea of this blog post today.

You see, gen societies used to corner the market on the educational opportunities available to genealogists. The society used to be where you went for educational classes, workshops, seminars, professional journals, and professional help. These days you can find much of the same content on social media, YouTube, Zoom society meetings, and other comparable technologies as you were getting from the society. And at a fraction of the cost. Much of it is on-demand as well.

Which finally leads me to the point. What is the genealogical society for these days? Many societies are trying to figure that out. I know I am. Other members of the board talk about the struggles ours and other societies are currently facing. Right now, I don’t know if I have all the answers. Or any answers.

But I do know one thing—members of the Mississippi Genealogical Society took me in when I moved to Mississippi. They accepted me, valued my input, asked me to serve. More importantly, they called me friend.

That’s what Genealogical Societies are for.

I know this because members (and nonmember friends) have participated in society meetings, both in person and via Zoom. They make comments, ask questions, serve refreshments, and banter about both the living and the dead. Members of the society get together with each other outside of society meetings, they make friends, help each other with various problems, and make the admission price well worth the value.

Outside of the meetings, some of them text me, email me, and communicate with me. They inform me of their needs, and they try to help others too. They find ways to associate with friends in and out of the community.

So as gen societies continue to struggle with their place amid changing technologies, it’s my recommendation to focus on the various needs they can provide the living, even if it’s not a domination of the genealogical education market. Maybe it’s genealogical travel or entertainment? Who knows? How can we best leverage the changing technology to engage a community, and not only on member of the society? These are just a couple of questions we can ask.

I'd also like to add this addendum. This article is definitely skewed towards in-person meetings. It's not meant to be that way so much as it's meant to show that society meetings are evolving. Zoom and other technologies are helpful and convenient. They broaden our opportunities for how we consume our content, especially genealogical education. My point here is that societies should focus on how to help their members thrive in a world that can be accessed both in-person or online. The question before us is--how?

Anyway, that’s all I have for today. In the meantime, I only know gen societies need to focus on the living, because only the living can help the living remember the dead in a meaningful manner.

Even when it’s done via Zoom.

Hey friends,

I found this obituary yesterday [1].

I typed the name Peter Everly into the search engine and bam, there it was, first thing! I’ve searched for this obit off and on for years. Technology, records collection updates, and more contributed to me finally finding it this week.

Peter is my 4x great-grandfather.

He died on May 28, 1900.

73 years later, on May 28^th, my brother was born. Coincidence? I think not.

Peter lived with his daughter Asenith when he died. Asenith is my 3x great-grandmother. She lost her first husband during the Civil War, and was later divorced from John Groves, her second husband. Obviously, she has some stories. Maybe I'll get to them in the blog sometime. 

The article claims Peter was 95 years, 3 months, 11 days when he died. Some people might dispute that. I say it made him an old man when he saddled up for the Cavalry during the Civil War, mustering out in his 50s. What a boss.

Yeah, there’s some good stuff in this obit. I’m grateful to find it so I can continue to write down stories about my family. And to learn who they were, what their lives were like, and feel a deep connection with those who’ve gone before.

There’s a line in his obit that reads, “The angels of heaven, so fair, came down and carried him up there to rest with his loved ones gone before, who it seems he had a desire to meet in a better land.”

Grand-Dad Peter, it seems you were a genealogist and family historian at heart. Enjoy your time with family on the other side, and one day, I hope to pull up a chair and we can share all the family stories.

• 1.     "In Memoriam," West Virginia Argus (Kingwood, West Virginia), p. 3, col. 4. 7 June 1900. Newspapers.com. (https://www.newspapers.com/image/827922925/ : accessed 23 September 2025).  

Last night I watched this video on YouTube (click on the word video or YouTube to view the video). I’ve never watched any of Carly’s videos before, so I let it repeat. Seeing a young lady walk into a bookstore and being unable to find the books she wanted caused the inner-librarian demon perched in the depths of my heart to rear its ugly head.

Who were these poor salesmen at Barnes and Noble? I asked. Why couldn’t they find something of interest for Carly? Why weren’t they asking any of the right questions?

Questions such as—What do you mean when you say, “genealogy books?”

Do you want books that teach you genealogical skills and practices? Books such as Organizing Your Genealogy by Drew Smith? Or Who Do You Think You Are?: The Essential Guide to Tracing Your Family History by Megan Smolenyak?

Do you want genealogical reference materials that genealogists might pull from the shelves when facing a tough issue? Maybe something like Elizabeth Shown Mills', Evidence Explained? Or even something like Ernest Thode’s German/English Genealogical Dictionary?

Since genealogy is a multidisciplinary field, do you want books that help you explore a tangentially related topic that helps you in your work? Maybe something like Kip Sperry’s Reading Early American Handwriting?

Do you want some sort of memoir that is also an exploration of genealogy but borders on genealogical entertainment? Like It’s All Relative by A. J. Jacobs or Unearthed by Meryl Frank?

Do you want some kind of non-fiction that can help inform the genealogical work you’re currently working on? I recently picked up A History of Heists by Jerry Clark and Ed Palatella because I learned of a number of bank robberies various family members had connections with.

Now, I’m not here to say Barnes and Noble typically carries any of these books. Or that Carly asked the wrong questions. Sometimes I’m searching high and low in bookstores and libraries the same as her and can't find what I want. But I do wish I knew exactly what is thought of when people say genealogy books.

Because genealogy is a business, and that means money, and money means there should be something out there in the way of book stores catering to genealogy enthusiasts. And if we can’t find it, or aren’t writing it, or haven’t produced it in some way, then we’re probably doing something wrong. Not Barnes and Noble. And right this second I am not talking about books that are a collection of records that have been transcribed and collected as a genealogy resource--such as Scottish Soldiers of Colonial America or First Census of Kentucky, 1790.

No I'm not talking about those books because, well, I don't believe for one second they're on the list for my next thrilling read (genealogy fan that I am). And I don't believe for one second that Barnes and Noble would ever stock something like that. 

Because in the end, let's be frank, even the genealogy world won't let those texts truly circulate (Do we even know how thrilling those texts actually are?), even in the local history room at your local library. Sometimes my inner-librarian demon just wants more, more, more genealogy. 

Unfortunately, some texts will probably only remain available in local and genealogical libraries, and on sites such as HathiTrust, The Internet Archive, and FamilySearch. 

Don't worry, throughout all these questions and discussion, I understand the difference between entertainment, utility, knowledge, and all the reasons people create resources that are published by genealogical publishing companies. But that doesn't mean there's not some opportunity to explore what people want when they enter this field and hobby called genealogy. 

Even so, we can still find something genealogically related at the book store, right? Please tell me I'm not wrong. Because no matter how much I love genealogy, Scottish Soldiers of Colonial America will not be my next thrilling read. 

But Unearthed might. 

I recently asked some friends if they would be willing to write stories about their family members. They all said, “No.” (And gave me their various reasons why.) Of course, I asked the question with the expectation being that they share those stories with others.

And that expectation, folks, is the real reason they all said, “No.”

You see, writing is an activity that burdens the writer with the desire to be good or entertaining or touching or profound (insert whatever desire here). Writing is also an activity that burdens the writer with ideas of sharing the writing.

Writers often view writing as a performative act. But it doesn’t have to be. The writer chooses whether to publish the writing or not. A writer of a diary might keep said diary under lock and key. The writer of a journal might only jot down various ideas and words or sketches that have meaning only to him.

People write for many reasons.  Just as people read for many reasons.

But here’s the thing—just like doing research, you’ll probably find that if you don’t write down your family stories, you will eventually forget them. You might not forget everything, but some of the extra details that make the story pop will fade. So please, if you have a family story you want to preserve, write it down. Write it down with no expectations. And if you have to have an expectation, let it be this—I promise to write it down, even if I keep it under lock and key.

That way your nosy snoopy family members can find it later.

Just kidding. Sometimes having the expectation of privacy is the only expectation that will motivate people to write. It’s a totally different mindset for someone when they write in secret vs. for the public. And by writing it you can preserve the story.

If you consistently write down the stories of your family, maybe one day in the future (near or far) you will want to share them with others.

And if you still don’t want to share, guess what?

Life will be fine either way.

Plus you’ll have a catalog of family stories in your treasure chest.

If I’m frank, I didn’t want to write a blog today. Not at all. I wanted to let it slide. Forget about it.

I told myself, “Hey, who’s going to read it anyway?”

I gave myself other excuses too. Such as, “You’ve got a sick daughter hanging out with you today. Everyone will understand if you don't post anything.”

Those are the kinds of thoughts I entertained before I said, “To hell with it. Write the blog anyway.”

So here it is.

I like to talk. A lot.

Yeah, I’m a yapper.

And one of the subjects I like to talk about is genealogy.

On Saturday night a friend of mine said, “You know, my wife always tells me to come look at some document she’s found. I don’t get it.”

He was all the way across the room, sitting on the couch next to his son. Between us was a coffee table, a plant, and a television with the college football game playing. Even with all the distractions, I saw an in for some good conversation.

“You don’t like genealogy?” I asked.

His son, who was sitting next to him, shook his head and mouthed the words, “Not at all.”

“I guess not,” my friend said. “Maybe if I found out some stories about my ancestors I would find it interesting, but I don’t care about random war documents that tells me nothing about them. Or other things like that.”

“Well,” I responded, “what if the war document told you what regiment or squadron or battalion your ancestor served in? Then you could go and look up what your ancestor did in the war. You could learn where they fought, how they served, and what happened to them. The regiment’s story is your ancestor’s story. What then? That’s one of the things I do if I haven’t learned enough. I think that’s pretty cool.”

By then the football game we were watching came back from the commercial break and we sat there in the blue light, far across the room from each other, and no closer to me converting him to the glories of genealogy.

But at least he brought up the subject in the first place. For me that signals he’s willing to be persuaded.

At least I didn’t kill the subject by reciting to him a long list of the names in my family tree. Then I would have bored everyone. Even the other genealogists in the room.

And that's a win. 

All football scores aside. 

When I was growing up. My family had dedicated evenings for family time. We played together. Complained together. Got in the boxing ring together. (My mom really hated when her kids fought.) We did a lot together. Sometimes family time was rewarding. Sometimes it was fatiguing. It was always memorable.

That practice now translates into the habit of me calling my mom whenever I can. I try to call my mom about once a week. When I do, it never fails that I’ll say something like, “Hey mom, do you remember the old Stop and Go off Highway 12?”

The questions are always yes or no questions. The questions are always meant as a lead into a subject I’ve prepared beforehand. In other words, the Stop and Go might not be the real topic I want to talk about, they’re just an easy way to broach the discussion. In fact, it’s often the case that my questions are subjects I wouldn’t ever have a reason to talk about in the first place.

But here’s the kicker. My mom never answers yes or no. She always jumps into a story about the Stop and Go or whatever it was I mentioned. And half the time, she’s interrupting me with her story before I even finish the question. Then I slap my forehead, sigh at a decibel level where she can’t hear me, and try to be patient while she tells me her story.

During which I’m cursing myself because she interrupted me or dragged me away from the reason I called in the first place. I’m cursing myself because I knew better than to have broached the subject that way but still haven’t learned not to.

All of which brings me to this point—sometimes I get tired of my family. Now don’t get me wrong. I love my mom. And I love listening to her stories. Oftentimes when I visit though, I find myself falling back into old habits and patterns I’ve discarded since the days I lived with them. Or I find myself loving our time together for the first few days but am really looking forward to sleeping in my own bed when I get home, or living in my regular routine, or avoiding the quirky habits of my siblings that are more annoying than adorable.

Now don’t get me wrong, I love my mom and my siblings. I just happen to also love not living with them. I love being able to take a break from them. Just like I know my mom loves it when I call her about once a week. Because she definitely needs a break from my brother and sisters who are the ones who care for my aging mother.

Breaks can be good and healthy for us. That’s why we break from work for the weekend or take a vacation. That’s why we rest at the end of the day. It gives us a chance to reset and refocus on what we really need. Especially our thoughts, desires, plans, and work. All of that is to say that sometimes it’s nice to have a break from genealogy too. To take a day off and think about something other than where those pesky ancestors are hiding. Take it from me, they aren’t going anywhere.

For some of us, taking a vacation or stopping to relax can be difficult. Yet often, if we are in a rut, the break is exactly what we need.

If this is you and you've had enough family time and you need a day off from genealogy, consider this your permission slip to take the day off. Your family, with all their quirky and annoying habits, will still be there when you get back. Plus, it’ll be fun to get reacquainted with them when you get back.

Just promise yourself you won’t be that guy who decides he wants nothing to do with the family and ditches everyone. Don’t be that guy. But a day or a week? Yes, that can help you get inspired to get back in the game. You might find new record collections available when you get back. You might look at your timelines with a fresh perspective. You might even find new records and stories. You might even fall into some of the same old patterns as before. Something similar to the way I know mom’s going to interrupt me with some story before I even finish asking her a question the next time I call.

I love her anyway.

And even if I’ve never, ever, annoyed her with any of my personal, adorable, quirky, loving funny, amazing habits, she might need a break from me too. 

Sometimes the records we find don’t say much. Sometimes it’s not necessary for them to say all that much.

I recently came across this little gem in the Cassville Republican, a newspaper from Cassville, Missouri [1]. The article was printed on 12 April 1906.

As you can see from the article, my 4^th great-granduncle Wheeling Combs was feeling pretty down. Even the townsfolk noticed how sad he felt. Like anyone else who discovers their ancestors in the newspapers. I asked all the questions. Why was he feeling down? Why would the paper print only this one line or two? Can you give me more information?

Then I noticed the date and looked up this gem [2].

This particular article gave me all the answers I needed. This one was written a week earlier and printed in the same paper, dated 5 April 1906.

After reading it, I think I know why Uncle Wheeling was feeling pretty down. In fact, these two articles and the subtext between them hit me hard. I can feel Wheeling’s loss.

I feel it heavy, as if watching and mourning with a living friend who lost a loved one today.

A friend recently told me he only gets snippets of information about his ancestors, not the larger stories. I told him that everything is a story.

Sometimes, if we piece together little snippets of information, like we did with these two newspaper articles, the larger stories shine through.

That’s the value of subtext.

1. "Mt. Pleasant," Cassville Republican (Cassville, Missouri), p. 1, col. 5. 12 April 1906. Newspapers.com (https://www.newspapers.com/image/335463397/ : accessed 19 August 2025).  

2. "Butterfield," Cassville Republican (Cassville, Missouri), p. 4. col. 2. 5 April 1906. Newspapers.com (https://www.newspapers.com/image/335463311/ : accessed 19 August 2025).